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We will do all of your chores from now on. Lizzy looked at me in awe.But…you hate chores, she said. Well, youre worth it, I said. A tapping sound at the window caught our attention. Oh. Thats probably my boyfriend, Emma said, perking up. So you two can get out now, so I can get some of what Im sure youll be giving each other soon. I looked at Lizzy, she looked at me, and I could tell by the horny look in her eyes that Emma was right. We were definitely going to spend the night fucking each other silly. Thanks, Emma, I said, taking Lizzy by the hand and pulling her out of the room. Dont say I never did you any favors, she said, and shut the door. So, I said to Lizzy. Your room or mine? Hmm…I was thinking more like the laundry room, she said. Weve havent done it there yet. I like the way you think, I said, and I wrapped my arm around her as we headed downstairs. So, hey sis, since youre in love with me and all…does that mean youll let me do you in the butt? And how exactly do those two. He adds this: “One thing. If you ever hear, ‘Big John’s a-comin’’, just get out of here as fast as you can!”He works there for a few weeks, when one day, he’s cleaning the place, and there’s an incredible commotion outside. People are yelling, screaming “Big John’s a-comin! Big Jooooohn’s a-comin!”As he’s trying to leave the bar, though, he’s knocked over by a massively huge man, riding an even bigger mountain lion, using a twelve foot rattlesnake for a whip! The man rides the mountain lion up to the bar, tosses the rattlesnake into the corner, and bellows out “Gimme a barrel of pickle juice!”Our young hero goes into the store room and rolls out a barrel of pickle juice. The man rips the lid off with his teeth and drains it all in one gulp, and tops it off with a belch that rattles windows three towns away.The young man meekly asks “Would you like another barrel of pickle juice?” “Ain’t got time!” comes the reply. “Big John’s a-comin’!”An older, balding, white haired, duck hunter.
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